I don't know why he is never home to see these damn things, but I got out of the shower and in front of the door was another giant house spider. I killed it. Bastard. Anyway, Derek was at work, so I thought I would tell him about it.

Me: Why are you never here to see these damn things?! Just killed one of those giant house spiders.
Derek: How big? ^_^
Me: About the same size as the other two. It was right by our bed too, not in the living room.
Derek: Crazy
Me: Yeah, giant house spiders sharing the same living space as me = not cool.
Derek: ^_^
Me: It was by your side of the bed, at least.
Derek: Fuck you
Me: Hey, I killed it for you. I'll bring it back to life and put it on your pillow if you want to throw down.
Derek: No >_<
Me: That's right. You don't fuck with someone who can bring giant house spiders back to life.